I was at walmart the other day, and I was sitting on a bench waiting for my mom to pay, and I was braiding my hair because that’s something I do when I’m bored, and this dude walks by and says, “hey baby, what else can you do with your hands?” I gave him my most polite smile and said in the sweetest way possible, “strangle you.”
And I think I actually scared him because his eyes got kind of wide and he just walked away.
All of you are wrong. The J in GIF is silent. Like in José.
Hif.
Being told I was smart and above average from a young age was probably one of the worst things to happen to me because now I have a complex and question my entire existence when I dont excel at something right away100% accurate


Ugh you guys I was so confused for like ten seconds. Apparently I’ve forgotten how to read headlines.
GOD
SNORT
HAHAHAHAH
I am uncomfortable with how long it took me to read this correctly…